This week's DVD releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

The Assassin ***½ Directed by Hsiao-Hsien Hou. An assassin (Qi Shu) accepts a dangerous mission to kill a political leader in seventh-century China. Conventional and easy-to-follow narratives can be found anywhere, but very few of them occur in films that are as visually ravishing and formally graceful as what Hou has cooked up here.

Chi-Raq *** Directed by Spike Lee. A modern day adaptation of the ancient Greek play Lysistrata by Aristophanes, set against the backdrop of gang violence in Chicago. Lee’s carnival-esque filmmaking style, which can leave some of his joints in tatters, helps this one expand in sorrowful heart and indomitable wit. This is a vibrant community mural of a movie, and it stretches to the horizon.

The New Girlfriend *** Directed by Francois Ozon. A young woman (Anais Demoustier) makes a surprising discovery about the husband (Romain Duris) of her late best friend. Duris and Demoustier are excellent in a pair of exceedingly complex and emotionally fractious roles, and Ozon’s supremely confident directorial hand and clear affection for these characters transforms the film from a could’ve-been psycho-thriller into a smart, humanistic examination of identity reshaped in the shadow of grief.

In My Father’s House *** Directed by Ricki Stern, Anne Sundberg. After rap artist Che "Rhymefest" Smith decides to raise his new family in his boyhood home on Chicago’s South Side, he learns that his estranged father is a homeless alcoholic living in the neighborhood and sets out to reestablish a connection. Filmmakers Stern and Sundberg bring a skilled and nuanced storytelling to the film, which never shies away from the harder moments.

Meet the Patels *** Directed by Geeta and Ravi Patel. An Indian-American man (Ravi Patel) who is about to turn 30 gets help from his parents and extended family to start looking for a wife in the traditional Indian way. A clever hybrid of documentary and romantic comedy.

A Brilliant Young Mind **½ Directed by Morgan Matthews. A socially awkward teenage math prodigy (Asa Butterfield) finds new confidence and new friendships when he lands a spot on the British squad at the International Mathematics Olympiad. The success here is mostly due to nuanced performances and an appreciation for what these kinds of films require.

Goosebumps **½ Directed by Rob Letterman. A teenager (Dylan Minnette) teams up with the daughter (Odeya Rush) of young adult horror author R. L. Stine (Jack Black) after the writer’s imaginary demons are set free on the town of Madison, Delaware. There’s a streak of old-fashioned B-movie spooky playfulness here, and when actual, motivated characters are on screen it’s delightful.

The Wannabe ** Directed by Nick Sandow. Hell-bent on becoming a big-shot gangster, Thomas (Vincent Piazza) will do anything to get in good with the Mafia. But when his inept efforts fall flat, he and his wife (Patricia Arquette) set out to rip off the mobsters Thomas was hoping to impress. Since Thomas’ character is incapable of change or variation, and the film’s only engaging supporting players occupy a small fraction of the running time, it falls squarely upon Arquette to carry the film.

Burnt *½ Directed by John Wells. A chef (Bradley Cooper), who destroyed his career with drugs and diva behavior, cleans up and returns to London, determined to redeem himself by spearheading a top restaurant that can gain three Michelin stars. A tasteless concoction — one gay character is particularly misjudged — that’s instantly forgettable.

Brush With Danger ½* Directed by Livi Zheng. Two undocumented immigrants to America, a brother and sister, struggle to get by in an unfamiliar world until the girl’s paintings catch the eye of an art broker who wants to sell them. Although the characters repeatedly express their worship of "original art" in gilded frames, the script consists of singularly unoriginal dialogue.

No explanation necessary

This week's DVD releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

The Diary of a Teenage Girl ***½ Directed by Marielle Heller. A teen artist (Bel Powley) living in 1970s San Francisco enters into an affair with her mother's (Kristen Wiig) boyfriend (Alexander Skarsgard). This is the rare movie that presents the subject of the loss of virginity from the female perspective. Not only is the film unique in this regard, but also in its frankness, humor, and artistry. An honest and personal and unblurred examination (even through that druggy blur) of a tricky voyage into womanhood.

Eden ***½ Directed by Mia Hansen-Love. A teenager (Felix de Givry) in the underground scene of early-‘90s Paris, forms a DJ collective with his friends and together they plunge into the nightlife of sex, drugs, and endless music. Restrained but never tentative, remote yet enormously affecting, the movie’s evocation of artistic compulsion is accomplished with confidence and verve. No matter what is going on, Hansen-Love's talent for bringing us inside a specific world makes this an experience we all can connect to.

All Things Must Pass *** Directed by Colin Hanks. A documentary that explores the rise and fall of Tower Records. Supplementing interviews with well-chosen archival material, Hanks assembles a capsule history of the music business and youth culture. It makes you appreciate anew the one-on-one social dimension lost in the music industry’s headlong switch to digital downloads.

Straight Outta Compton *** Directed by F. Gary Gray. The group NWA emerges from the mean streets of Compton in Los Angeles in the mid-1980s and revolutionizes Hip Hop culture with their music and tales about life in the hood. The performances are terrific, and when it’s on its game, which is often, it’s an explosive look at the creation of a message that had to be delivered by the only people who could deliver it, a message that is, unfortunately, as timely now as when we first heard it.

Everest **½ Directed by Baltasar Kormakur. A climbing expedition on Mt. Everest is devastated by a severe snow storm. Though there is heroism as well as love here, because it involves the deaths of people we have come to care about, this is finally a sad story, though not always a dramatically involving one. A valiant effort that never quite scales the dizzy emotional heights required, running out of oxygen in the final act. Visually, though, it’s stunning.

Learning to Drive **½ Directed by Isabel Coixet. As her marriage dissolves, a Manhattan writer (Patricia Clarkson) takes driving lessons from a Sikh instructor (Ben Kingsley) with marriage troubles of his own. What spares this movie is an awful lot of comedic talent and artistic good will. Clarkson and Kingsley imbue average material with easy charm and wit, clicking onscreen with the smooth platonic chemistry of old friends.

Woodlawn **½ Directed by Andrew and Jon Erwin. A gifted high school football player (Caleb Castille) must learn to embrace his talent and his faith as he battles racial tensions on and off the field. This overly long yet consistently involving period drama could be described, accurately, as equal parts Remember the Titans and revivalist tent meeting. But until the balance tips rather too blatantly toward the latter during the final minutes, the overall narrative mix of history lesson, gridiron action and spiritual uplift is effectively and satisfyingly sustained.

The Cut **½ Directed by Fatih Aikin. In 1915 a man (Tahar Rahim) survives the Armenian genocide in the Ottoman Empire, but loses his family, speech and faith. One night he learns that his twin daughters may be alive, and goes on a quest to find them. It’s a big, ambitious, continent-spanning piece of work, concerned to show the Armenian horror was absorbed into the bloodstream of immigrant-descended population in the United States, but it is a little simplistic emotionally.

A Girl Like Her ** Directed by Amy S. Weber. A high school student (Lexi Ainsworth) enlists the help of her best friend (Jimmy Bennett) in order to document the relentless harassment she's received from her former friend (Hunter King), one of the school's most popular students. A mix of found-footage thriller, mock-documentary realism and public service announcement that rings true almost as often as it rings false.

Samba ** Directed by Eric Toledano and Olivier Nakache. Living in Paris illegally for nearly a decade, a Senegalese refugee (Omar Sy) suddenly finds himself in a detention center and on the verge of deportation when an immigration caseworker (Charlotte Gainsbourg) steps in to help. The film is loosely plotted and is at least 20 minutes too long. It seems ready to end half a dozen times before it finally does, with ironic payoffs for its two leading characters that are too glib to be satisfying.

Jem and the Holograms *½ Directed by Jon M. Chu. Much to her surprise, a teen rocker (Audrey Peebles) becomes an overnight star via the social networking universe. There are a few sweet moments early in the film, but then the movie’s lumbering, overstuffed, unfocused plot shows up, and whatever high hopes we might have had for this latest exploitation of 1980s nostalgia are slowly ground away.

Stonewall * Directed by Roland Emmerich. A young man's (Jeremy Irvine) political awakening and coming of age during the days and weeks leading up to the Stonewall Riots. A well-intentioned, profoundly silly and borderline insulting movie.

Not that many surprises in today’s Oscar nominations

I’m scratching my head trying to figure out why the Hollywood movie establishment doesn’t like Ridley Scott. Hey, I’m not among those who think The Martian is a motion picture landmark. It reminded me more of one of those fun films I used to see back in the 1940s as part of the Saturday matinee at the Jackson Theater in New York City. In other words, I liked it, but didn’t elevate it to greatness. But, still, it landed a best picture Oscar nomination this morning and Matt Damon was nominated for best actor. But Scott, the film’s director, did not make the final five in that category. And when I was conversing with Hollywood insiders to determine my predictions for the Oscar nominations they were telling me they really believed this was the year for Scott’s gold watch, a make-up best director Oscar win more for his body of work (Alien, Blade Runner, Thelma & Louise, The Duelists, Black Hawk Down, Matchstick Men, American Gangster, even his Someone to Watch Over Me, a film I liked a lot more than most) than just The Martian. Fifteen years ago, The Gladiator won just about every Oscar available, but Scott was passed over for his direction of the film. To see him left off the list completely shocked me.

The only other real surprise was the omission of Aaron Sorkin’s screenplay for Steve Jobs. Although Michael Fasbinder, to the surprise of absolutely no one, received a nomination for this performance in that film, the movie is really all screenplay.

I must admit I was a tad shocked by the supporting actor nomination of Tom Hardy, even though I consider him one of the best actors working today (watch Locke and The Drop back-to-back and that will give you a hint of the range of this amazing actor), instead of Idris Elba. It’s possible Elba just didn’t make the cut because not enough voters saw or even wanted to see his film — Beasts of No Nation is really difficult to sit through and it didn’t exactly send cash registers booming.

I also found it interesting that, largely because it has the most nominations, The Revenant came out of this morning’s Oscar announcement as the front-runner for the best picture Oscar, yet that film’s screenplay did not receive a nomination. It’s standard for the best picture winner to score a screenplay nomination and usually it also wins that Oscar as well. The last time a best picture winner did not receive a screenplay nomination was 1998 when Titanic came away as the big winner. Before that, you have to go all the way back to 1965's The Sound of Music to find a best picture winner that did not have a screenplay nomination.

So there’s that.

Here is a list of the nominees: (An asterisk preceding the nominee signifies one I did not predict)

Best Picture
The Big Short
Bridge of Spies
Brooklyn
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Room
Spotlight

Best Director
* Lenny Abrahamson, Room
Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu, The Revenant
Tom McCarthy, Spotlight
Adam McKay, The Big Short
George Miller, Mad Max: Fury Road

Best Actor
Bryan Cranston, Trumbo
Matt Damon, The Martian
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Revenant
Michael Fassbender, Steve Jobs
Eddie Redmayne, The Danish Girl

Best Actress
Cate Blanchett, Carol
Brie Larson, Room
Jennifer Lawrence, Joy
Charlotte Rampling, 45 Years
Saoirse Ronan, Brooklyn

Best Supporting Actor
Christian Bale, The Big Short
* Tom Hardy, The Revenant
Mark Ruffalo, Spotlight
Mark Rylance, Bridge of Spies
Sylvester Stallone, Creed

Best Supporting Actress
Jennifer Jason Leigh, The Hateful Eight
Rooney Mara, Carol
* Rachel McAdams, Spotlight
Alicia Vikander, The Danish Girl
Kate Winslet, Steve Jobs
(McAdams nomination was a pleasant surprise. I thought Helen Mirren (Trumbo) or Jane Fonda (Youth) would grab that final spot.

Best Original Screenplay
Bridge of Spies
* Ex Machina
Inside Out
Spotlight
Straight Outta Compton
(A little surprised Ex Machina took the spot I thought would go to Quentin Tarantino’s The Hateful Eight.)

Best Adapted Screenplay
The Big Short
Brooklyn
Carol
* The Martian
Room
(Just stunned that The Martian is in here and Steve Jobs isn’t)

Best Cinematography
Carol
The Hateful Eight
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Revenant
Sicario
(No surprises. Predicted these five.)

Best Costume Design
Carol
Cinderella
The Danish Girl
Mad Max: Fury Road
* The Revenant
(Somewhat surprised The Revenant edged out Brooklyn in this category)

Best Film Editing
The Big Short
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Revenant
Spotlight
* Star Wars: The Force Awakens
(I had The Martian in here, but not all that surprised Star Wars replaced it.)

Best Makeup and Hairstyling
Mad Max: Fury Road
* The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed out the Window and Disappeared
The Revenant
(Never saw The 100-Year-Old Man coming; figured it would be Black Mass because of all the talk about Johnny Depp’s hair in the picture.)

Best Production Design
Bridge of Spies
* The Danish Girl
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
* The Revenant

Best Score
Bridge of Spies
Carol
The Hateful Eight
* Sicario
Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Best Song
* Fifty Shades of Grey - Earned It
The Hunting Ground - Til it Happens to You
* Racing Extinction - Manta Ray
Spectre - Writing's on the Wall
Youth - Simple Song #3
(You would think by now I would know better than to try to predict this category, although three out of five is one of my better years.)

Best Sound Editing
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Sicario
Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Best Sound Mixing
* Bridge of Spies
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
(Really thought Straight Outta Compton had a shot at a nomination in this category.)

Best Visual Effects
* Ex Machina
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
* The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
(I had The Walk and Jurassic World in here and still believe they should have been included.)

Best Animated Feature
Anomalisa
* Boy and the World
Inside Out
Shaun the Sheep Movie
* When Marnie Was There

Best Documentary Feature
Amy
Cartel Land
The Look of Silence
* What Happened, Miss Simone?
* Winter on Fire: Ukraine's Fight for Freedom
(Hmm. No Going Clear. No He Named Me Malala. Strange)

Best Foreign Language Film
* Embrace of the Serpent
Mustang
Son of Saul
* Theeb
A War

(I did not try to predict the rest of these categories)
Best Animated Short
Bear Story
Prologue
Sanjay's Super Team
We Can’t Live without Cosmos
World of Tomorrow

Best Documentary Short
Body Team 12
Chau, Beyond the Lines
Claude Lanzmann: Spectres of the Shoah
A Girl in the River: The Price of Forgiveness
Last Day of Freedom

Best Live Action Short
Ave Maria
Day One
Everything Will Be Okay (Alles Wird Gut)
Shok
Stutterer

Last minute Oscar prediction changes

I can do this because I make rules here (as Tom Petty once sang, "it’s good to be king.") so I am making some slight modifications to my final Oscar nominations predictions.

• In the best picture race, I’m dropping Star Wars: The Force Awakens from contention and replacing it with Straight Outta Compton.
• In the best director race, I’m dropping Todd Haynes (Carol) and replacing him with Adam McKay (The Big Short).
• In supporting actor, I’m dropping Michael Keaton (Spotlight) and replacing him with Christian Bale (The Big Short).
• In original screenplay, replacing Joy with Straight Outta Compton.

I am so looking forward to this

One of the best trailers I have seen in ages.

This week's DVD releases

Click on title to see the movie’s trailer

The Look of Silence **** Directed by Joshua Oppenheimer. A family that survives the genocide in Indonesia confronts the men who killed one of their brothers. A harrowing and important documentary. This film makes it clear that these monstrous humans are very much a part of our species. In a way, I wish I’d never seen The Look of Silence, because now I won’t be able to forget it. But that’s the point, and the film’s purpose — calling attention to the cost of staying silent, and willfully forgetful, in the face of implacable evil.

The Second Mother ***½ Directed by Anna Muylaert. When the estranged daughter of a hard-working live-in housekeeper suddenly appears, the unspoken class barriers that exist within the home are thrown into disarray. Touching, funny, perceptive and simple enough to carry large audiences, it is carried throughout by a hilarious, intelligent and soulful performance from veteran Brazilian actress, comedian and TV host Regina Case, surrounded by a solid supporting cast.

The Martian ***½ Directed by Ridley Scott. During a manned mission to Mars, Astronaut Mark Watney (Matt Damon) is presumed dead after a fierce storm and left behind by his crew. The film is shot, designed, computer-generated, and scripted on a level that makes most films of its ilk look slipshod. Scott and writer Drew Goddard aren’t trying to make an "important" sci-fi movie like Interstellar. They aim lower but blow past their marks. And perhaps most importantly, not only does the film stress the importance of using math and physics and botany and chemistry to solve problems, but it also makes a plot based on scientific inquiry and audacity just as exciting and even more unpredictable as the movies’ usual brand of problem-solving, the kind that involves punching everyone and then blowing everything up.

In the Basement *** Directed by Ulrich Seidl. A documentary that reveals what its subjects do in their respective basements. Grabby and grubby in equal measure, this meticulously composed trawl through the contents of several middle-class Austrians’ cellars (a space, according to Seidl, that his countrymen traditionally give over to their most personal hobbies) yields more than a few startling discoveries.

This Changes Everything **½ Directed by Avi Lewis. A look at seven communities around the world with the proposition that we can seize the crisis of climate change to transform our failed economic system into something radically better. While the stories this documentary tells are lively and never uninteresting, they fail to ignite an emotional explosion. The reach is also too broad for a film.

Uncle John **½ Directed by Steven Piet. An urbanite (Alex Moffat) returns to his quiet hometown on an impromptu trip as his uncle (John Ashton), widely respected in town, struggles to evade suspicion of a murder. A fair amount of this film puts us behind the wheel or alongside Ashton as he drives, preoccupied with his misdeeds, along country roads lined with cornfields. No dialogue is needed; in these transitions, Ashton and his surroundings are enough.

Irrational Man ** Directed by Woody Allen. A tormented philosophy professor (Joaquin Phoenix) finds a will to live when he commits an existential act. Allen builds to a climax that is ridiculous and a comment on … I don’t know. Fate? Folly? There are plenty of both in this movie, but they’re not often a comfortable mix.

Hotel Transylvania 2 *½ Directed by Genndy Tartakovsky. Dracula (Adam Sandler) and his friends try to bring out the monster in his half human, half vampire grandson (Asher Blinkoff) in order to keep Mavis (Selena Gomez) from leaving the hotel. By the end of this 89-minute film, I was absolutely on the edge of my seat. Not due to suspense, but due to my utter disdain for the infantile plotting.

Contracted: Phase II *½ Directed by Josh Forbes. Riley (Matt Mercer) searches for a cure to the virus that took over Samantha (Najarra Townsend) before it consumes him and the entire world. The virus is spreading, but the filmmakers don't appear fully committed to the idea of a zombie apocalypse, so no sense of dread (or suspense) ever takes hold.

Sinister 2 * Directed by Ciaran Foy. A young mother (Shannyn Sossamon) and her twin sons (Robert and Dartanian Sloan) move into a rural house that's marked for death. A retread of such brainless, shameless lameness that it’s hard to imagine anyone begging for another installment.

Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension * Directed by Gregory Plotkin. Using a special camera that can see spirits, a family must protect their daughter from an evil entity with a sinister plan. There may well be new and novel ways to spark audience shivers from not-so-bright homeowners inexplicably using their cameraphones to check out bumps in the night, but this series clearly has neither the patience nor the inclination to look for them anymore.

David in Dallas

I only got to see David Bowie, who died last night at the age of 69 following an 18-month battle with cancer, once in concert. He played Dallas' Memorial Auditorium on April 10, 1978, supporting his albums Low and Heroes. I was a tad leery walking into the hall because Bowie had created this image for himself of performing these esoteric avant-garde shows that might have had a certain appeal among the Manhattan intelligentsia and a lot of the London art community, but might not play that well in the American heartland. I need not worry. Bowie performed a memorable, straightforward, rock 'n' roll show. Here's part of it filmed that night in Dallas by Bowie's production company.

 

 

 

Thanks to the great Robert Wilonsky for digging up my original Dallas Morning News review of that concert.

 

 



Elvis & Nixon ... er, I mean Shannon & Spacey

I must admit, Kevin Spacey is not the first actor who comes to mind when I think of someone to portray former President Richard Nixon, but take a look at this trailer. He nails it. And Michael Shannon, another one of the best, if not as appreciated by the public as Spacey, actors out there also seems to turn in a surprisingly decent imitation of Elvis Presley. Now I'm not quite sure who thought the Dec. 21, 1970, meeting between the two could sustain a feature length motion picture (and I still have my doubts about that), but at least the characterizations seem right on target. I guess we'll know more when the film opens April 15.

Although I support Bernie Sanders ...

...this ad makes a lot of sense.

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away ...

Update on this week's DVD releases

I failed to recognize on important film that's now currently available on DVD. Click on the title to see the film's trailer.

Sicario ***½ Directed by Denis Villeneuve. An idealistic FBI agent (Emily Blunt) is enlisted by a government task force to aid in the escalating war against drugs at the border area between the U.S. and Mexico. By turns thrilling, disorienting and draining, it exists in a border zone seemingly of its own devising between the art film and the action movie. What keeps it from cynicism is the nature and depth of Villeneuve’s gaze, not childishly wide-eyed but capable still of feeling pain. He’s a terrific director. You know that if his heroine gets out of Cartel-land alive, she might spend a few months in an asylum, but she’ll be back, hell-bent on seizing the foreground.

Fridge Control

This Week's DVD Releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

Experimenter ***½ Directed by Michael Almereyda. In 1961, social psychologist Stanley Milgram (Peter Sarsgaard) conducted a series of radical behavior experiments that tested ordinary humans willingness to obey authority. Technically puckish where appropriate but grounded by strong performances from Sarsgaard and Winona Ryder. The film is not awards bait but makes some Big Thinker biographies that are look staid.

The Walk *** Directed by Robert Zemeckis. In 1974, high-wire artist Philippe Petit (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) recruits a team of people to help him realize his dream: to walk between the World Trade Center towers. Harnessing the wizardry of special effects to magnify the sheer transporting wonder, the you-are-there thrill of the experience, the film’s payoff more than compensates for a lumbering setup, laden with cloying voiceover narration and strained whimsy.

A Brave Heart: The Lizzie Velasquez Story *** Directed by Sara Hirsh Bordo. Traces the inspiring journey of Lizzie Velasquez, who was born with a medical condition that left her with distorted facial features. The filmmakers leave a few too many questions unanswered, but their subject’s immense optimism steamrolls through the documentary’s shortcomings. Indeed, there seems to be little this woman can’t vanquish.

Infinitely Polar Bear **½ Directed by Maya Forbes. A manic-depressive mess of a father (Mark Ruffalo) tries to win back his wife by attempting to take full responsibility of their two young, spirited daughters. Forbes has created a warm family portrait, even though it sugarcoats the specter that mental illness casts on this group’s well-being.

Sleeping with Other People **½ Directed by Leslye Headland. A good-natured womanizer (Jason Sudekis) and a serial cheater (Alison Brie) form a platonic relationship. The script makes the characters a little too witty and spot-on with cultural references, but what makes it work, to the extent that it does, is the innate liability of Sudeikis and Brie.

Northern Soul **½ Directed by Elaine Constantine. Set in 1974, a tale of two friends whose horizons are opened by the discovery of black American soul music. This feisty, frequently amusing chronicle of one young man’s journey through the dancehalls of Lancashire nails its time and place. A pity, then, that the story is so tiresomely familiar.

The Visit ** Directed by M. Night Shyamalan. A single mother finds that things in her family’s life go very wrong after her two young children visit their grandparents. While Shyamalan competently scares us from time to time and makes us laugh uncomfortably at the odd actions — aren’t we snickering at mental illness? — he has nowhere interesting to take this simple tale.

Love ** Directed by Gaspar Noe. An American living in Paris enters into a highly sexually and emotionally charged relationship with an unstable woman. When the movie works, Noé achieves a lulling, melancholic frenzy about sex and memory, but the foundation isn’t strong enough to make his movie ever seem more than a stereoscopic fermata: one envelope-pushing note held way too long.

Ashby ** Directed by Tony McNamara. A high-school student (Nat Wolff) enters into a friendship with his neighbor (Mickey Rourke), a retired CIA assassin who only has a few months left to live. Rourke and Wolff certainly have chemistry, and Sarah Silverman (as the student’s concerned single mom) and Emma Roberts (as his potential girlfriend) provide solid support on the edges. But the humor never feels aimed in any particular direction.

The Green Inferno *½ Directed by Guillermo Amoedo, Eli Roth. Determined to save an Amazon tribe being squeezed by logging, a group of students finds nothing but trouble when their plane crashes in the jungle. Unfortunately, the unbridled shock value isn’t matched by a similar investment in other ingredients that might have made this low rent B-movie worthwhile.

Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse * Directed by Christopher Landon. Looking forward to their last campout together as Boy Scouts, three high school friends face a surprise when they realize their town has come under attack by zombies. The gags are mostly puerile and uninspired — like the film was dreamed up by a bunch of tired, wired 13-year-olds; it has their insistence but little of their invention.

Condemned ½* Directed by Eli Morgan Gesner. While living in a crumbling and squalid abandoned building in New York City, a group of youngsters falls prey to a virulent disease that turns all of them into maniacal killers. One of the most egregiously awful horror films in recent memory.

Final Oscar Nomination Predictions

The Oscars will be announced in less than two weeks so this will be my final stab at predicting the ultimate nominees. Within each category, the nominees are listed in the order in which I think they stand to be nominated; i.e., the nominee listed first is the one I think most likely to get a nominaton. The number in parenthesis is the nominee's ranking in my December predictions.

PICTURE
Spotlight (1)
The Martian (3)
Carol (6)
The Revenant (2)
Mad Max: Fury Road (NR)
The Big Short (NR)
Brooklyn (8)
Room (5)
Bridge of Spies (7)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (NR)
Dropped out: Joy, Steve Jobs, Inside Out

DIRECTOR
Ridley Scott, The Martian (3)
Tom McCarthy, Spotlight (1)
George Miller, Mad Max: Fury Road (NR)
Alejandro Gonzales Inarritu, The Revenant (2)
Todd Haynes, Carol (5)
Dropped out: David O. Russell, Joy

ACTOR
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Revenant (1)
Michael Fassbinder, Steve Jobs (2)
Eddie Redmayne, The Danish Girl (4)
Bryan Cranston, Trumbo (NR)
Matt Daman, The Martian (3)
Dropped out: Johnny Depp, Black Mass

ACTRESS
Brie Larson, Room (1)
Saoirse Ronan, Brooklyn (4)
Cate Blanchett, Carol (3)
Jennifer Lawrence, Joy (2)
Charlotte Rampling, 45 Years (5)

SUPPORTING ACTOR
Mark Rylance, Bridge of Spies (3)
Sylvester Stallone, Creed (NR)
Idris Elba, Beasts of No Nation (4)
Mark Ruffalo, Spotlight (2)
Michael Keaton, Spotlight (1)
Dropped out: Tom Hardy, The Revenant

SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Rooney Mara, Carol (1)
Alicia Vikander, The Danish Girl (2)
Jennifer Jason Leigh, The Hateful Eight (5)
Kate Winslet, Steve Jobs (3)
Helen Mirren, Trumbo (NR)
Dropped out: Jane Fonda, Youth

ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Spotlight (1)
Inside Out ((3)
The Hateful Eight (4)
Bridge of Spies (5)
Joy (2)

ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Room (2)
Carol (3)
Steve Jobs (1)
Brooklyn (4)
The Big Short (NR)
Dropped Out: The Revenant

CINEMATOGRAPHY
The Revenant (1)
Mad Max: Fury Road (2)
Sicario (3)
Carol (5)
The Hateful Eight (NR)
Dropped out: Bridge of Spies

COSTUME DESIGN
Carol (2)
Cinderella (1)
The Danish Girl (3)
Brooklyn (4)
Mad Max: Fury Road (5)

FILM EDITING
Mad Max: Fury Road (1)
Spotlight (2)
The Revenant (3)
The Martian (4)
The Big Short (NR)
Dropped out: Bridge of Spies

MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLE
Mad Max: Fury Road (2)
Black Mass (NR)
The Revenant (NR)
Dropped out; The Danish Girl; Star Wars: The Force Awakens

PRODUCTION DESIGN
Mad Max: Fury Road (1)
Carol (2)
Bridge of Spies (4)
The Martian (5)
Cinderella (3)

SCORE
Star Wars, The Force Awakens (1)
Carol (4)
The Hateful Eight (5)
Inside Out (2)
Bridge of Spies (NR)
Dropped out: The Danish Girl

SONG
(This is my first month predicting the nominees in this category)
"See You Again," Furious 7
"Simple Song 3,: Youth
"Til It Happens to You."The Hunting Ground
"Writings on the Wall," Spectre
"Love Me Like You Do," Fifty Shades of Grey

SOUND EDITING
Mad Max: Fury Road (1)
The Martian (4)
The Revenant (3)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2)
Sicario (5)

SOUND MIXING
Mad Max: Fury Road (1)
The Martian (3)
The Revenant (4)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2)
Straight Outta Compton (5)

VISUAL EFFECTS
The Martian (1)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (3)
Mad Max: Fury Road (4)
Jurassic World (2)
The Walk (5)

ANIMATED FEATURE
Inside Out (1)
Anamolisa (2)
The Good Dinosaur (3)
Shaun the Sheep Movie (4)
The Peanuts Movie (5)

DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
(This is my first month to predict the nominees in this category)
Amy
The Look of Silence
Going Clear
Cartel Land
He Named Me Malala

FOREIGN LANGUAGE FEATURE
(This is my first month to predict the nominees in this category)
Son of Saul
Mustang
Labyrinth of Lies
The Brand New Testament
A War

The 10 Best Films of 2015

Although I will reserve the right to change my mind ever so slightly after seeing all these films at least twice (so far I have only seen five of these 10 twice), right now, this is my list of the 10 best films of 2015:
1.  Carol
2.  Inside Out
3.  Spotlight
4.  Timbuktu
5.  Mad Max: Fury Road
6.  Brooklyn
7.  The Diary of a Teenage Girl
8.  Room
9.  Tangerine
10. Amy

The 25 Best Films Released on DVD in 2015

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

1. Boyhood Directed by Richard Linklater. Starring Ethan Hawke, Patricia Arquette, Ellar Coltrane, Lorelei Linklater. The greatest movies, the ones that stick with us, are those that hold up a mirror to the human condition and reflect something back at us that we too often manage to overlook. Boyhood is one of those movies, and with it Linklater proves he is among the best practitioners of that art. A home movie of a fictional home life, an epic assembled from vignettes, Boyhood shimmers with unforced reality. It shows how an ordinary life can be reflected in an extraordinary movie.

2. Inside Out Directed by Pete Docter, Ronaldo Del Carmen. Starring Amy Poehler, Bill Hader, Lewis Black, Mindy Kaling, Phyllis Smith. I never saw a movie this year with a more brilliant combination of imagination, emotionally moving moments, witty writing, visually interesting details and psychologically accurate behavior than this one. It’s as audacious as it is silly, as funny as it is imaginative.

3. Mr. Turner Directed by Mike Leigh. Starring Timothy Spall. Through it all, Spall is equally enigmatic and transfixing: With his guttural croaks and barks, his J.M.W. Turner is often difficult to understand, but, thanks to Spall’s amazing physical performance and Leigh’s sensitive, information-laden direction, he’s never incomprehensible.

4. Leviathan Directed by Andrei Zvyagintsev. Magnificently acted, expertly crafted and unerringly sure of every treacherous step it takes, Leviathan is an indictment, but also an elegy, a film set among the monumental ruins of a culture, whether they’re the skeletal remains of boats, a whale’s bleached bones, a demolished building or a trail of lives that are either ruined or hopelessly resigned. It may be the one true masterpiece of global cinema to be released this year on DVD.

5. Timbuktu Directed by Abderrahmane Sissako. A transcendent political poem as intellectually rigorous as it is beautiful. Sissako’s point, while never heavy-handed, is hard to miss: Traditional Muslims are among the world’s biggest victims of Islamic militarism. A thoroughly remarkable and disquieting film, it is also a work of almost breathtaking visual beauty, but it manages to ravish the heart while dazzling the eye simultaneously, neither at the expense of the other. It’s a work of art that seems realized in an entirely organic way.

6. Mad Max: Fury Road Directed by George Miller. Starring Tom Hardy, Charlize Theron. Will leave you speechless, which couldn't be more appropriate. Words are not really the point when it comes to dealing with this barn-burner of a post-apocalyptic extravaganza in which sizzling, unsettling images are the order of the day. Even in the most chaotic fights and collisions, everything makes sense. This is not a matter of realism — come on, now — but of imaginative discipline. And Miller demonstrates that great action filmmaking is not only a matter of physics but of ethics as well. There is cause and effect; there are choices and consequences. It’s all perfectly, wonderfully, fantastically crazy. Amidst all those ingenious, power-packed road warrior sequences, Fury Road contains a surprising amount of depth and character development.

7. Selma Directed by Ava DuVernay. Starring David Oyelowo, Tom Wilkinson. A gripping, inspiring and sometimes terrifying historical drama, loaded with specific detail, that brings a turning point of the civil rights movement back from black-and-white obscurity to present-tense urgency. Even if you think you know what’s coming, Selma hums with suspense and surprise. Packed with incident and overflowing with fascinating characters, it is a triumph of efficient, emphatic cinematic storytelling. And much more than that, of course. Oyelowo takes full advantage of his close physical resemblance to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., but he wisely avoids mere impersonation, delivering a performance that’s as sensitive as it is spellbinding.

8. Two Days, One Night Directed by Jean-Pierre Dardenne, Luc Dardenne. Starring Marion Cotillard. This is a small, compassionate gem of a movie, one that’s rooted in details of people and place but that keeps opening up onto the universal. Her shoulders slumped, her eyes weary, her gait heavy, Cotillard moves past naturalism into something impossible to doubt and hard to describe. Her character is an ordinary person in mundane circumstances, but her story, plainly and deliberately told, is suspenseful, sobering and, in the original, fear-of-God sense of the word, tremendous.

9. Whiplash Directed by Damien Chazelle. Starring Miles Teller, J.K. Simmons. This is a muscular and accomplished work of kinetic cinema built around two tremendous acting performances, and it’s really about teaching and obsession and the complicated question of how to nurture excellence and where the nebulous boundary lies between mentorship and abuse. Chazelle proves an exceptional builder of scenes, crafting loaded, need-to-succeed moments that grab your attention and hold it tight.

10. Birdman (or The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu. Starring Michael Keaton. The director has wisely assembled an ensemble of performers who know how to handle a long take; this will certainly rank among Keaton's career highlights — in a role that allows him to completely dump out his paintbox and show a vast range of emotion — but everyone shines.

11. Citizenfour Directed by Laura Poitras. Both an urgent tale torn from recent headlines and a compelling work of cinema, with all the paranoid density and abrupt changes of scenery of a John le Carré novel.

12. Life Itself Directed by Steve James. Gives measured and pragmatic reflection to many of the things that are most interesting about film critic Roger Ebert's personal and professional life. James has done a wonderful job of telling a colorful life story.

13. Force Majeure Directed by Ruben Ostlund. A movie about something not often explored in film: the consequences of male weakness in a world in which men are expected to be strong at all times. It's the rare kind of film-watching experience that will haunt you long after you turn off the TV and could lead to some very awkward conversations with your spouse. A brutally smart and original film.

14. The Babadook Directed by Jennifer Kent. Starring Essie Davis, Noah Wiseman. Believe it or not, the real horror of this superb Aussie monster movie has almost nothing to do with the title fiend and everything to do with the unspoken, unspeakable impulses he represents. Remove the Babadook from The Babadook, in other words, and something plenty terrifying remains.

15. Amy Directed by Asif Kapadia. Amy Winehouse’s story is a tragic one — as with Kurt Cobain, who also died at 27, her potential as a singer and songwriter was only just beginning to be realized. Yet the prevailing mood of this documentary is joy. Kapadia captures what was irreplaceable about this unique performer, and in the process gives her the opportunity to do what she was made to do, the only thing she ever really wanted: to sing.

16. Tangerine Directed by Sean Baker. Starring Kitana Kiki Rodriguez, James Ransone, Mya Taylor. Writer-director Baker’s sun-scorched, street-level snapshot is a work of rueful, matter-of-fact insight and unapologetically wild humor that draws a motley collection of funny, sad and desperate individuals into its protagonists’ orbit. It’s touching for its non-condescending stance toward working girls and the spirit of the sidewalk.

17. Love Is Strange Directed by Ira Sachs. Starring John Lithgow, Alfred Molina. Calling this a great gay love story is both precise and inaccurate; I didn’t see a more finely performed and beautifully crafted love story, with or without any mere modifiers, on DVD this year. In addition to the performances — truly, everyone is good — what stands out is Sachs' direction. It's measured, patient. The scenes play out as one imagines the characters' lives would.

18. It Follows Directed by David Robert Mitchell. Starring Maika Monroe. A smart, relentlessly chilling thriller that opts for originality over cheaply rejiggered jolts. Pretty much earns its buzz as the scariest and best-engineered American horror movie of recent years, and that’s all down to Mitchell’s sophisticated understanding of technique and the trust and freedom he accords his youthful cast.

19. ‘71 Directed by Yann Demange. Starring Jack O’Connell. This is more than just a performance showcase, delivering a gripping, at times almost unbearably tense, incredibly involving anti-war statement, made the stronger for being set against the less cinematically familiar backdrop of Belfast in the year 1971. Nothing is extraneous, no moment that doesn't enhance the tension of this nightmare scenario is allowed to survive, until the proceedings become, in the best possible sense, almost unbearable to watch.

20. Red Army Directed by Gabe Polsky. In this swift, smart, often very funny film, Polsky takes an unprecedented look at the legendary Soviet-era hockey program and its life after glasnost, exposing an athletic system that became a crucial symbol of Communist history and politics, but also discipline, grace and brooding, melancholy soul. Good sports movies are always about more than sports and this one touches on themes of friendship and perseverance. It also offers a compact and vivid summary of recent Russian history.

21. The End of the Tour Directed by James Ponsoldt. Starring Jesse Eisenberg, Jason Segel. Like Almost Famous, Ponsoldt’s film gets at something deep and true about the journalist/subject dynamic and the phony intimacy and tiny betrayals implicit in it. It’s a profoundly moving story about a towering talent who seemed to feel too much and judge himself too harshly to stick around for long. What a shame. There was a cry from fans of novelist David Foster Wallace fans when Segel was cast (some are still up in arms), but he’s terrific. So is Eisenberg, in an even more difficult role, as Rolling Stone reporter and novelist David Lipsky.

22. Foxcatcher Directed by Bennett Miller. Starring Channing Tatum, Mark Ruffalo, Steve Carell. Another strange and compelling anthropological drama from Miller, a director with evident expertise at enabling Oscar-worthy star performances. Though anchored by an affecting and sullen turn by Tatum, the movie derives its primary discomfiting power from Carell in a revelatory performance as a monster of American wealth.

23. Inherent Vice Directed by Paul Thomas Anderson. This isn't the towering masterpiece that those who admired There Will Be Blood and The Master were probably hoping for, and thank God for that. It's loose and free, like a sketchbook, though there's also something somber and wistful about it — it feels like less of a psychedelic scramble than the novel it's based on. It serves as a portrait of 1970 California that mixes absurdity with an air of looming cataclysm, a volatile formula that wouldn’t work without central performance from Joaquin Phoenix.

24. Shaun the Sheep Movie Directed by Mike Burton, Richard Starzak. In a bold move that pays off, the movie jettisons dialogue altogether and tells its whole story through barn-animal noises, goofy sound effects, and sight gags so silly they’d make Benny Hill spin in sped-up ecstasy. The effect is contagiously cute. A world-class winner.

25. Love & Mercy Directed by Bill Pohlad. In telling the story of one damaged suburban genius and his unlikely rebirth, Love & Mercy captures the vanished possibilities of 1960s pop music, the fecklessness of the California dream and its decay into tragedy and madness, and other things less easy to describe or define. It doesn’t claim to solve the mystery of Brian Wilson, but it succeeds beyond all expectation in making you hear where he was coming from.

This Week's DVD Releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

Bone Tomahawk *** Directed by S. Craig Zahler. Starring Kurt Russell. Russell’s performance is certainly one reason to see this unexpected low-budget treat, a witty fusion of western, horror and comedy that gallops to its own beat. That rhythm is dictated entirely by writer/director Zahler, a novelist and musician who flips genre conventions upside-down and cares more about character than body count.

The Intern ** Directed by Nancy Meyers. Starring Robert DeNiro, Anne Hathaway. Meyers seems content to make a nice movie about nice people doing their best to be nice to each other despite one or two not-nice things that happen along the way. That’s all very nice, but not particularly the stuff of potent or rousing entertainment.

A Walk in the Woods ** Directed by Ken Kwapis. Starring Robert Redford, Emma Thompson, Nick Nolte. It has its charming, lively moments, but also many that just feel tired and listless, as if the filmmakers were working off a checklist of all the things two well-past-middle-age travelers would say and do while trekking through the wilderness.

Heist *½ Directed by Scott Mann. Starring Robert DeNiro, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Gina Carano, Morris Chestnut. Would the movie be as (barely) entertaining as it is without De Niro? He only has about 15 minutes’ worth of scenes in the film, but whenever he’s on-screen the film almost feels legitimate.

The Perfect Guy *½ Directed by David M. Rosenthal. Starring Sanaa Lathan, Michael Ealy, Morris Chestnut. There’s certainly an audience for these thrillers, but imagine how big that audience might be for one that really works.

Jenny’s Wedding * Directed by Mary Agnes Donaghue. Starring Katherine Heigl. A movie so hopelessly late to the coming-out party that you want to haul everyone connected with it into the 21st century.

Hitman: Agent 47 * Directed by Aleksander Bach. Writers Skip Woods and Michael Finch have a few tricks up their sleeves as betrayals emerge and allegiances shift. But it’s not enough to make us care or to keep the third act from being a head-scratching mess.

Some Kind of Hate * Directed by Adam Egypt Mortimer. Like so much teen-targeting modern horror, it opts for dull angsty brooding over the very sort of grim-and-gruesome sleaziness that might have made its premise interesting.

This week's DVD releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

Queen of Earth ***½ Directed by Alex Ross Perry. Two women (Elizabeth Moss, Katherine Waterston) who grew up together discover they have drifted apart when they retreat to a lake house together. A lovingly rendered, feel-bad chamber piece chock-full of elliptical psychodrama.

Black Mass *** Directed by Scott Cooper. The true story of Whitey Bulger (Johnny Depp), the brother of a state senator and the most infamous violent criminal in the history of South Boston, who became an FBI informant to take down a Mafia family invading his turf. Despite Depp’s seemingly flawless efforts, less may have been more in conveying just how bloodthirsty Bulger was. Where the film excels is with a stellar cast whose spot on performances keep your interest as the film moves along.

Pawn Sacrifice **½ Directed by Edward Zwick. The tumultuous life of chess wunderkind Bobby Fischer (Tobey Maguire), from his formative years to his epic world championship match against Soviet archrival Boris Spassky (Liev Schreiber) in Reykjavik, Iceland, during the height of the Cold War. This is a film in which, as the end credit documentary footage attests, the real story overwhelms its dramatization.

Nasty Baby **½ Directed by Sebastian Silva. Fixated on having a baby, bohemian artist Freddy (Silva) enlists his best friend, Polly (Kristen Wiig), to bear a child for him and his boyfriend. But the trio's happy lives are disrupted when a deranged neighbor begins to torment them. Subverting expected narratives may have been Silva’s aim all along; still, the turn isn’t just nasty, it’s confounding.

Dragon Blade *½ Directed by Daniel Lee. When corrupt Roman leader Tiberius (Adrien Brody) arrives with a giant army to claim the Silk Road, Huo An (Jackie Chan) teams up his army with an elite Legion of defected Roman soldiers led by General Lucius (John Cusack) to protect his country and his new friends. The picture never finds its tone: It's neither go-for-broke outrageous enough to be consistently funny, nor energetic enough to be viscerally entertaining. It may not be as bad as you might fear, but it certainly isn’t as much fun as you might hope.

Pan *½ Directed by Joe Wright. With pirates roaming the landscape, a young lad (Levi Miller) is transported to the magical kingdom of Neverland, where he's destined to become the hero Peter Pan. The film doesn’t deliver on its own promise. The movie doesn’t so much enhance our understanding of the flying boy as it demonstrates how little thought went into crafting his back story.

War Room * Directed by Alex Kendrick. From the outside, the lives of Tony (T.C. Stallings) and Elizabeth (Priscilla Shirer) Jordan appear perfect, but their marriage is in shambles. After seeking counsel from a wise older woman (Karen Abercrombie), Elizabeth realizes it will take a deep commitment to prayer to keep her world from crumbling. It may not be as brazenly offensive as God’s Not Dead or as spectacularly inept as Kirk Cameron’s Saving Christmas, but it’s still awful, offering all the forced humor and superficial substance of a half-baked homily.

An idea for a dramatic film

There are those who will argue Traffic already undertook this subject 15 years ago (Wow! It doesn't seem that long ago), but it seems to me that in the right hands, Cartel Land, which is now a documentary (admittedly unseen by me at this point), could be made into a riveting dramatic motion picture. Take a look for yourself:

This week's DVD releases

Click on title to see the film’s trailer

Top Spin ***½ Directed by Sara Newens, Mina T. Son. Documentary that follows a trio of determined teen athletes as they undergo the rigors of training for a spot on the 2012 U.S. Olympic table tennis team. With sleek and informative onscreen graphics and thrilling slow-motion demonstrations of game technique, Top Spin packs a lot of information into its 80-minute running time, arguing that a great table tennis player is one part boxer, one part chess master.

Mission: Impossible — Rogue Nation *** Directed by Christopher McQuarrie. Ethan (Tom Cruise) and team take on the mission of eradicating the Syndicate — an International rogue organization as highly skilled as they are that’s committed to destroying the IMF. Ultimately, as inconsequential as it all is, Rogue Nation is not pretending to be anything it isn’t. And as a sensory escapist experience with laughs, pleasures, and excitement, it will likely be a most satisfying mission viewers will choose to accept repeatedly.

Time Out of Mind *** Directed by Oren Moverman. Homeless and struggling to survive on the streets of New York City, George Hammond (Richard Gere) admits himself to Bellevue Hospital as a last resort. Before long, he finds a sympathetic soul named Dixon (Ben Vereen), who encourages George to try to repair his relationship with his estranged daughter (Jena Malone). The film’s not entirely effective as drama. The pacing and sparse plot keep it from being truly immersive, and it’s not exactly a film designed to spur social change, either. Instead, it’s worth watching for Gere’s most uncompromising three-dimensional performance in 20 years.

He Named Me Malala **½ Directed by Davis Guggenheim. A documentary that looks at the events leading up to the Taliban’s attack on Pakistani schoolgirl, Malala Yousafzai, for speaking out on girls’ education followed by the aftermath, including her speech to the United Nations. Guggenheim largely dodges lodging her story within a greater political context; a choice, but a shame, for when he does, the movie gains tension.

Wolf Totem **½ Directed by Jean-Jacques Annaud. During China’s Cultural Revolution, a young urban student (Shaofeng Feng) is sent to live with Mongolian herders, where he adopts a wolf cub. It sets out to take the viewer on a journey, but ends up giving them little more than a pleasantly diverting sight-seeing tour. There are worse ways to spend two hours. Better ones, too.

Slow Learners ** Directed by Don Argott, Sheena M. Joyce. When platonic pals and co-workers Jeff (Adam Pally) and Anne (Sarah Burns) fail to ignite sparks in their romantic lives, they make a pact to improve themselves, launching a makeover campaign they’re certain will leave them confident and lucky in love. Even if this movie isn’t fresh, it’s often amusing.

Ted 2 ** Directed by Seth McFarlane. Newlywed couple Ted, a stuffed bear, and Tami-Lynn want to have a baby, but in order to qualify to be a parent, Ted will have to prove he’s a person in a court of law. Feels like far too many other sequels: born of box office expectations more than a bona fide reason to return to the characters we loved the first time around.

Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials *½ Directed by Wes Ball. After having escaped the Maze, the Gladers now face a new set of challenges on the open roads of a desolate landscape filled with unimaginable obstacles. Ball’s film is a mad dash from one place to the next, with little time in between for rest, recuperation or plot development.

The Strongest Man *½ Directed by Kenny Riches. Angst-ridden Beef (Robert Lorie), who fancies himself as the strongest man in the world, and his hapless best buddy, Conan (Paul Chamberlain) embark on a quest to reclaim Beef’s most cherished possession: a gold BMX bike that’s been stolen. Thinly amusing, The Strongest Man stretches a short’s worth of potentially funny ideas to feature length, where they slowly and surely lead nowhere in particular.

Fantastic Four * Directed by Josh Trank. A team of scientists who suddenly acquire superhuman abilities are soon obliged to put them to use when a powerful nemesis with malevolent plans threatens Earth. So bereft of all the things we expect from a superhero movie — humor, excitement, adventure, awe — that it plays like a drawn-out pilot episode for an upcoming TV series no one would ever watch again.

Handicapped Harley

Does anyone else in the wide, wide, wide, wide, wide world of sports think a handicapped license plate on a Harley seems a little strange?

No explanation necessary