Memos from Pete

Memo to all-Americans: Guv. Hair has given up on his misguided presidential quest. You can sleep peacefully tonight.

Memo to Texas Rangers fans: Sorry. I can’t get all that excited by the signing of the hurling Darvish. Maybe if one — just one — of these Japanese pitching phenoms had become an ace on a MLB staff I could be more optimistic. But the signing of a Japanese pitcher is as thrilling to me as staying at a Holiday Inn where a Japanese pop singer is featured in the lounge. Which reminds me: What has happened to the Japanese film industry? It used to produce some of the best movies in the world.

Memo to Municipal Judge Phyllis Lister Brown: If your paycheck comes from the City of Dallas, then you are an employee of the City of Dallas, not the state of Texas. Step down from your judgeship while running in a partisan election and quit your whining.

Memo to Dallas residents: Might as well accept the fact you live in a city, an urban environment. And chickens are not welcomed in the yards of urban environments. Want chickens in your back yard. Move to Howe. It’s just south of Sherman. I used to work there and, trust me, it’s just the place for having chickens in the backyard. Dallas? University Park? Not so much.

Memo to Jerry Jones: You are little more than two cornerbacks away from having a Super Bowl contending team. Sign a top-notch free agent cornerback (there will be a couple available) and use your first draft pick to get second one. Voila! Instant fix.

Memo to those interested in this weekend’s NFL playoffs: I’m thinking we’re about to have a replay of Super Bowl XLII — one of the most entertaining of these usually non-entertaining events ever, the one in which the New York Giants beat the previously undefeated New England Patriots 17-14. This time, however, I don’t think it will be that close.