The eyes of the world are upon Texas

First of all, I am convinced the women of Texas are perfectly capable of making their own health care decisions and don't need a right-wingnut governor, like the one who called the people in this video "terrorists," making those decisions for them.

Also thinking how much better we'd all be if either Wendy Davis or Cecile Richards were governor of Texas.

Here's Davis's reaction to Gov. Hair calling another special legislative session:

"Misplaced priorities of legislative leaders squandered a tremendous opportunity to make much needed improvements in our transportation infrastructure and help create good jobs and bring businesses to Texas. Despite urging by responsible members of the Senate to bring up the matter of transportation, Lt. Governor David Dewhurst derailed as much as much as $1 billion per year in transportation funding by stubbornly pushing divisive, failed legislation attacking women's health care options.

If leaders are serious about using this second called special session to improve the lives of Texans by repairing and expanding our transportation networks, they will find no greater ally than me. If they intend to keep pushing their extreme personal political agenda ahead of the interests of Texas families, I will not back off of my duty to fight on their behalf. "

Hair, the misogynist that he is, criticized Davis for standing up for women's freedoms by saying, in effect. "She should know better. She was a teenage mother herself." Here's Davis's reaction to that:

"Rick Perry's statement is without dignity and tarnishes the high office he holds. They are small words that reflect a dark and negative point of view.

Our governor should reflect our Texas values. Sadly, Gov. Perry fails that test."

The Hispanic Situation

 

I find myself agreeing with Dallas Mayor Mike Rawlings more often than not, but he is totally clueless about what happened in the most recent Dallas City Council elections. Before the election, three Hispanics served on the council. Then that august body got together, like it’s required to do every 10 years, and redrew its district boundary lines with the aim of electing four Hispanics to the council. When the dust cleared and the new council was inaugurated Monday, it contained two Hispanic members.

Rawlings said in his speech at the ceremony (it was technically not an "inaugural address" because he was not up for re-election) that the problem is that the city charter needs to be "tweaked" to improve the way the council redraws the district boundaries. He said the current method is too messy and too "political."

"We must minimize politics and maximize effectiveness to achieve racial representation with geographical tightness to keep our neighborhoods’ integrity high," he said.

Hate to tell you this, Mayor Mike, but eggs will be taken out of omelettes before politics is taken out of redistricting. It is, by definition, a political process.

Look, Mayor Mike, why do you think Republicans in the House of Representatives aren’t afraid to oppose immigration reform? Why, when all the pundits say Republicans will never get the Hispanic vote unless they change their ways, do despots like Republican Ted Cruz, the shameful representative of our own border state, continue to fight immigration reform every chance he gets?

Because Cruz and the other ideologues like him have realized something Mayor Mike still hasn’t come to grips with: Hispanics don’t vote.

Now I’ve heard all kinds of reasons for this, some which even have a shred of legitimacy, but the fact remains that, by and large, the Hispanic population doesn’t go to the polls on election day as other groups do.

So instead of wasting time trying to find ways to "tweak" the city council, the mayor should put together a task force, headed by state Rep. Rafael Anchia, to discover and then implement ways to get the Hispanic population to the polls. And because this should be expanded to a statewide effort, I would nominate San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro to join Anchia at the head of this task force.

And this effort should begin immediately.

This week’s DVD releases

Upside Down ** Kirsten Dunst, Jim Sturgess, Timothy Spall. Directed by Juan Solanas. Adam and Eden fell in love as teens despite the fact that they live on twinned worlds with gravities that pull in opposite directions. Ten years after a forced separation, Adam sets out on a dangerous quest to reconnect with his love. A dystopic sci-fi romance about inverted planets that will have audiences wondering which way is up, but not really caring much or for very long. Solanas comes up with arresting images; it’s in telling the story that he stumbles, getting so tripped up in the allegorical details of his invented universe that his characters suffer. Its compelling conceit is immediately weighed down by leaden execution.

The Incredible Burt Wonderstone **½ Steve Carell, Jim Carrey, Alan Arkin, Steve Buscemi, Olivia Wilde, James Gandolfini, Jay Mohr. Directed by Dn Scardino. When a street magician’s stunts begins to make their show look stale, superstar magicians Burt Wonderstone and Anton Marvelton look to salvage on their act — and their friendship — by staging their own daring stunt. Overall the film never finds its footing, with its awkward shifts in tone accentuating the unease. There’s something a little off, and it’s Carell. I want to like him in comedies. It’s a big part of what’s made him a star. The Incredible Burt Wonderstone never really gives me the chance.

The Call **½ Halle Berry, Abigail Breslin, Morris Chestnut. Directed by Brad Anderson. When a veteran 911 operator takes a life-altering call from a teenage girl who has just been abducted, she realizes that she must confront a killer from her past in order to save the girl’s life. A pastiche of classic plot devices scrounged from The Taking of Pelham One Two Three, The Conversation, Blue Velvet, and dozens of other movies, the story often feels familiar, but director Anderson (The Machinist) has a such a flair for suspense that even the most jaded viewers will find themselves in a sweat.

No ****½ Gael García Bernal, Alfredo Castro, Antonia Zegers, Néstor Cantillana, Luis Gnecco. Directed by Pablo Larrain. An advertising executive comes up with a campaign to defeat military dictator Augusto Pinochet in Chile’s 1988 referendum. Even if No is not the whole truth — and no film is — its pungent dialogue and involving characters tell a delicious and very pertinent tale. And the messages it delivers, its thoughts on the workings of democracy and the intricacies of personality, are just as valuable and entertaining — maybe even more so. A troubling, exhilarating and ingeniously realized film that’s part stirring political drama and part devilish media satire. And it’s that rare political satire that can sound the depths of irony as No does and still end on a note of ambivalent hope.

A Place at the Table *** Jeff Bridges, Mariano Chilton, Tom Colicchio, Ken Cook. Directed by Ktisti Jacobson, Lori Silverbush. A documentary that investigates incidents of hunger experienced by millions of Americans, and proposed solutions to the problem. In addition to the dismaying facts and figures is a fuller sense of what hunger can look like, and feel like, among the millions of Americans classified as "food-insecure" — those who may not know, for themselves or their children, where the next meal will come from. A useful, engaging and enraging movie that will enlist supporters for its cause.

In the Family ****½ Sebastian Banes, Patrick Wang, Trevor St. John. Directed by Patrick Wang. When his domestic partner dies in a car accident, a man learns that their son has been willed to his partner’s sister. Deliberate and marked by uncommon grace, In The Family manages to feel politically and culturally acute without ever resorting to melodrama, or having to wave banners for issues or causes, except perhaps in its quiet way for a renewed humanism in movies and a return to stories about everyday lives.

The Rambler *½ Dermot Mulroney, Lindsay Pulsipher, Natasha Lyonne. Directed by Calvin Reeder. Freshly released from prison, a man sets off on a surreal journey through the back roads of America to reconnect with his estranged brother. Along the way, he encounters horrific supernatural hallucinations, grisly violence and other depravities. The narrative is haphazard, and by the middle of the film, it’s apparent that Reeder isn’t even trying to make sense. Unconventional storytelling can be entertaining, too, but The Rambler just seems weird for its own sake and in love with cheap shock value.

Da bag ban

Earlier this week, Los Angeles became the largest city in America to ban single-use plastic shopping bags. The ban will go into effect for large stores Jan. 1 and for all other stores July 1, 2014. Single-use paper bags were not banned, but customers who don’t bring their own reusable bags when they shop will have to pay 10 cents for each paper bag they need.

According to one story on the decision, "There is good financial reasoning behind the ban. Only five percent of single use plastic bags are recycled every year across the state and California municipalities spend almost $25 million a year to collect and throw away plastic bags that litter the streets and clog storm drains. Currently there are almost two billion plastic shopping bags and 400 million paper bags are distributed every year in Los Angeles."

The action by the Los Angeles Council, which enacted the ban on an 11-1 vote, came a week after two Dallas City Council committees were briefed on a ordinance proposed by Dwaine Caraway to ban both single use plastic and paper bags in Dallas. It’s not that Caraway is some sort of born-again environmentalist (even he admits he was the last person in Dallas to embrace recycling), but he’s laying the foundation for his mayoral campaign should incumbent Mike Rawlings decide not to seek a second term in two years, a time when term limits will force Caraway off the council.

Not that I fault Caraway for his actions. His goal is a sound one, although he should include Styrofoam containers in his ordinance as well. But some of his methods display his usual madness. His biggest mistake is insisting corporate sponsors, such as Coca-Cola , provide consumers reusable shopping bags free of charge. He doesn’t want to have consumers paying for them.

The way it appears, Caraway thinks only grocery stores pack their products in place plastic shopping bags. And even if that bit of lunacy was true, I doubt Coke is going to foot the bill for reusable shopping bags when the plastic containers their own products come in are coming under increasing attacks from environmentalists. Plus, if I was Tom Thumb, Kroger, Wal-Mart, etc., I would want my own logo on the bags — it’s called marketing.

Plus, what corporate sponsor is going to pay for the plastic bags used by such retail outlets as the Container Store, the Vitamin Shoppe and (ha! ha!) Condoms to Go, to name just three among thousands?

If Caraway has any hopes of passing his ban, he’s got to drop the idea of insisting that corporate sponsors pay for the reusable bags.

Of course, I’m not sure Caraway can get the pro-business council to buy into his ban idea even without the corporate sponsorship idea. While his proposed ordinance did seem to be greeted favorably by the Quality of Life Committee (even by committee chair Linda Koop who single handedly killed the last such proposed ordinance), it seemed to face a more hostile reaction from the Transportation and Environment Committee later the same day.

I still maintain that if the Dallas City Council wants to take a first-strike action to help the environment it should pass an ordinance that would not only prove the council was serious about all this "green stuff," but would also save taxpayers tens of thousands dollars annually as well as demonstrate unflinching support for a product the city itself fosters on all its citizens. That would be an ordinance prohibiting city funds be used for the purchase of water in plastic bottles. Take the first solo yourself, Dallas City Council, before you force others to sing your tunes.

A Dallas City Council make-over

As the infinitesimally small number of citizens who vote in local municipal elections know, the upcoming 15-member Dallas City Council will have five new members — Adam Medrano, Rick Callahan, Lee Kleinman, Jennifer Gates, and Philip Kingston.

Now I don’t know if anyone has noticed, but by the time the next City Council elections come around in two years, six — count ‘em, six — current council members will be term limited. And, if Mayor Mike Rawlings decides not to run for re-election, that will mean 12 of the 15 council members will have two years of experience or less legislating city affairs. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing because it will depend on the quality of the individuals doing the legislating. But considering that the three who will be left (assuming they decide to seek re-election and win) are Scott Griggs, Monica Alonzo and Sandy Greyson, the prospects for a progressive city agenda look grim.

The six who will be leaving in two years are Vonciel Jones Hill, Dwaine Caraway, Carolyn Davis, Tennell Atkins, Sheffie Kadane and Jerry Allen. Of course, if Rawlings decides one term is enough, you can bet your last dollar Caraway will be in the mayor’s race but he doesn’t stand a chance of winning.

I hope Rawlings does decide to stay on because that upcoming fresh-faced council is going to be in desperate need of his leadership.

This week’s DVD releases

Jack the Giant Slayer ** Nicholas Hoult, Eleanor Tomlinson, Stanley Tucci, Ian McShane, Bill Nighy, Ewan McGregor, Eddie Marsan. Directed by Bryan Singer. The ancient war between humans and a race of giants is reignited when Jack, a young farmhand fighting for a kingdom and the love of a princess, opens a gateway between the two worlds. A director as talented as Singer (The Usual Suspects, X-Men) should be working to raise popcorn movies to a higher level. Instead, this uninspired effort feels like a colossal letdown. Too scary for very young children, yet too silly for most older fans of director Singer’s films.

Movie 43 * Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber, Naomi Watts, Jeremy Allen White, Anna Faris, Chris Pratt, Kieran Culkin, Emma Stone, Justin Long, Uma Thurman, Kristen Bell, Bobby Cannavale, Halle Berry, Sean William Scott, Elizabeth Banks, Johnny Knoxville, Richard Gere, Kate Bosworth, Gerard Butler, Terrence Howard, Chloë Grace Moretz. Directed by Bob Odenkirk and 11 others. A series of interconnected short films follows a washed-up producer as he pitches insane story lines featuring some of the biggest stars in Hollywood. How many directors does it take to screw in a star-studded piece of aggressive stupidity and call it a movie? An even dozen, and there is no punch line. As sick-making sketch comedies go, this stupefyingly bad one — somehow rife with A-list talent — must rank near the very bottom.

Stoker **½ Mia Wasikowska, Nicole Kidman, Matthew Goode. Directed by Chan-wook Park. After a girl’s father dies, her uncle, who she never knew existed, comes to live with her and her unstable mother. She comes to suspect this mysterious, charming man has ulterior motives and becomes increasingly infatuated with him. This latest thriller from the South Korean director is a bizarrely perverse, beautifully rendered mystery that you may or may not care to solve. The final act walks a fine line between the sensational and the silly. Park is less interested in narrative suspense than in carefully orchestrated shocks and camouflaged motives.

21 & Over (no stars) Miles Teller, Skylar Astin, Justin, Chon, Sarah Wright. Directed by Jon Lucas, Scott Moore. The night before his big medical school interview, a promising student celebrates his 21st birthday with his two best friends. This is a movie that celebrates selfishness, stupidity and the mean-spirited insensitivity that goes along with it. We’re better than this, America.

Quartet **½ Maggie Smith, Tom Courtenay, Billy Connolly, Pauline Collins, Michael Gambon. Directed by Dustin Hoffman. At a home for retired musicians, the annual concert to celebrate Verdi’s birthday is disrupted by the arrival of an eternal diva and the former wife of one of the residents. A frothy and often charming directorial effort from Hoffman, his first in a Hollywood career that’s spanned five decades, that will keep Downton fans happy. Music lovers will appreciate both the score and the nostalgic end credits, which revisit the early years of the aged supporting cast (many of whom were actual musicians).

American Mary *** Katharine Isabell, Antonio Cupo, Tristan Risk. Directed by Jen Soska, Sylvia Soska. The story follows medical student, Mary Mason, as she becomes increasingly broke and disenchanted with the surgical world she once admired. The allure of easy money sends Mary into the world of underground surgeries which ends up leaving more marks on her than her so called "freakish" clientele. It’s a truly interesting slasher fest; in this one, the heroine gets to be both beauty and beast. Isabelle is phenomenal in one of the most original and politically engaged horrors of recent years, even if the second half isn’t a patch on the first.

The Last Exorcism Part II **½ Ashley Bell, Julia Garner, Spancer Treat Clark. Directed by Ed Gass-Donnelly. As Nell Sweetzer tries to build a new life after the events of the first movie, the evil force that once possessed her returns with an even more horrific plan. An effectively unnerving, slow-burn supernatural horror tale. The film is smartly different enough from the original to survive on its own, though it lacks some of the first film’s sense of surprise. At least this movie, like its predecessor, has Bell as Nell. An actress who suggests religious piety, carnal fire and satanic aggression with equal dexterity, Bell provides a pulse a viewer can connect with amid the standard-issue atmospheric accouterments.

The Brass Teapot * Juno Temple, Michael Angarano, Alexis Bledel. Directed by Ramaa Mosley. When a couple discovers that a brass teapot makes them money whenever they hurt themselves, they must come to terms with how far they are willing to go. Its comedic side never bites, and its moral side is painfully one-dimensional. A little to the left and The Brass Teapot might’ve been mean-spirited fun; a little to the right and it could play on The Hallmark Channel. For a movie with such an outlandish premise, it’s remarkably dull.

Come Out and Play **½ Daniel Giménez Cacho, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Vinessa Shaw. Directed by Makinov. A couple take a vacation to a remote island — their last holiday together before they become parents. Soon after their arrival, they notice that no adults seem to be present. A one-man band known as Makinov — he wrote, directed, produced, shot, edited and ran sound here — has done a pretty decent job in the chills department using a simple story, small cast and largely contained location.

Let My People Go **½ Nicolas Maury, Carmen Maura, Jean-François Stévenin, Amira Casar, Clément Sibony. Directed by Mikael Buch. At Passover, a French-Jewish man living in Finland with his Nordic boyfriend, finds himself back in Paris with his zany family after a lovers’ quarrel. The road to the inevitable slapsticky Seder is paved with more sweetness than bite, a good deal of frantic foolishness and progressively thinner laughs, all wrapped in a message of acceptance and inclusiveness.

Woody's latest

I'll admit it: I'm a big Woody Allen fan. I really want his films to be good and was thrilled with the triumph of Midnight in Paris, following what I believed to be a string of sub-par films (You Will Meet a Tall Dark Stranger, Whatever Works, Cassandra's Dream, Scoop, Melinda and Melinda, Anything Else) that seemed to overshadow his worthwhile projects during this period (Match Point, Vicky Cristina Barcelona.) Oh, how I longed for that Woody who had that string of great films in the 1970s, 1980s and even into the 1990s.

What followed Paris, however, was the utterly lackluster and instantly forgettable To Rome With Love.

But now he may be back on track with his upcoming Blue Jasmine. Judge for yourself:

Now that's an opening number

The Oscar telecast and just about all other awards shows can take a lesson from this. Last night's Tony Awards show provided another example of how to get an awards telecast off to a roaring start. My favorite (How Did He Do That?) segment of the opening was Neil Patrick Harris disappearing act and then reappearing in the back of the cavernous Radio City Music Hall.

The program even managed to maintain the momentum of its opening number all the way up to a Phantom of the Opera segment that basically killed all the excitement for the rest of the evening.

But that opening number is one to be remembered.

This week’s DVD releases

Oz the Great and Powerful ** James Franco, Mila Kunis, Rachel Weisz, Michelle Williams, Zach Braff, Bill Cobbs, Joey King, Tony Cox, Abigail Spencer, Martin Klebba, Bruce Campbell. Directed by Sam Raimi, A small-time magician is swept away to an enchanted land and is forced into a power struggle between three witches. A miscast Franco and a lack of charm and humor doom Raimi’s prequel to the 1939 Hollywood classic. Oz the Wimpy and Weak would be more like it.

Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters ½* Jeremy Renner, Gemma Arterton, Famke Janssen, Peter Stomare. Directed by Tommy Wirkola. Catching up with Hansel and Gretel 15 years after their incident involving a gingerbread house, the siblings have evolved into bounty hunters who hunt witches. This a film which is so demeaningly bad, so utterly without merit, that there is a kind of purity in its awfulness. There is a Zen mastery in producing a film which nullifies the concept of pleasure.

Snitch **½ Dwayne Johnson, Barry Pepper, Jon Bernthal, Michael Kenneth Williams, Melina Kanakaredes, Nadine Velazquez, Rafi Gavron, David Harbour, Benjamin Bratt, Susan Sarandon, Directed by Reic Roman Waugh. A father goes undercover for the DEA in order to free his son who was imprisoned after being set up in drug deal. This is the sort of movie that Charles Bronson would have made back in the day, and indeed a shot of Johnson standing in a sporting goods store, contemplating a wall of shotguns as he gets ready to get busy, could have come from any Death Wish. All the talking would be fine, but the dialogue is preachy, the drama too earnest and the action kind of sluggish, though it’s hard not to get a jolt when Johnson jumps behind the wheel. It’s like watching an elephant on ice: inelegant, but you admire the effort.

Wrong *½ Jack Plotnick, Eric Judor, Alexis Dziena, Steve Little, William Fichtner, Regan Burns, Arden Myrin. Directed by Quentin Dupieux. Dolph Springer wakes up one morning to realize he has lost the love of his life, his dog, Paul. During his quest to get Paul (and his life) back, Dolph radically changes the lives of others — risking his sanity all the while. The film lets most of its random gags and view-askew premises twist in the wind like hamhandedly wacky improv comedy, punctuated with synthesizer effects. The film’s misguided flatness is perhaps its fatal flaw, not so much deadpan or existential as just monotonous.

Knife Fight * Rob Lowe, Julie Bowen, Saffron Burrows, Jamie Chung, David Harbour, Eric McCormack, Jennifer Morrison, Carrie-Ann Moss, Richard Schiff. Directed by Bill Guttentag. A political strategist juggling three clients questions whether to take the high road as the ugly side of his work begins to haunt him. The tone of the movie is mean until the movie flips a switch and turns pious and mawkish as the lead character tries to make amends for past sins. Whether playing it sleazy or noble, Lowe brings little emotional weight to his role.

Mumia: Long Distance Revolutionary **½ Mumia Abu-Jamal, Cornel West, Alice Walker, Angela Davis, Rubin Carter, Giancarlo Esposito, Ruby Dee, Dick Gregory, Peter Coyote, Tariq Ali, Amy Goodman, Pam Africa. Directed by Stephen Vittoria. Chronicles the life and revolutionary times of death row political prisoner Mumia Abu-Jamal. The documentary is unapologetically one-sided, and spends more time canonizing Abu-Jamal than exploring the murder and trial themselves. Still it raises issues of racism in America (flashback to George Wallace) that are worthy of discussion.

This week’s DVD releases

A Good Day To Die Hard * Bruce Willis, Jai Courtney, Sebastian Koch, Mary Elizabeth Winstead. Directed by John Moore. John McClane travels to Russia to help out his seemingly wayward son, Jack, only to discover that Jack is a CIA operative working to prevent a nuclear-weapons heist, causing the father and son to team up against underworld forces. Everything that made the first film memorable — the nuances of character, the political subtext, the cowboy wit — has been dumbed down or scrubbed away entirely. Moore has directed the action sequences in a way that makes the incidents look so far-fetched and essentially unsurvivable that you can only laugh.

Warm Bodies *** Nicholas Hault, Teresa Palmer, Analeigh Tipton, John Malkovich. Directed by Jonathan Levine. After eating a young man's brains and absorbing the memories within, a freshly dead zombie falls in love with his victim's girlfriend. I don't know if the first zombie date flick is a step forward or backward for civilization as a whole, but I can say that Warm Bodies pulls off a pretty impressive trick: It has its Twilight and goofs on it too. It flouts convention in a number of ways in service of its genre-mash-up agenda while still contributing something original to the tradition of the zombie film.

Identity Thief **½ Jason Bateman, Melissa McCarthy, Amanda Peet, Jon Favreau, Robert Patrick, John Cho. Directed by Seth Gordon. Mild-mannered businessman Sandy Patterson travels from Denver to Miami to confront the deceptively harmless-looking woman who has been living it up after stealing Sandy's identity. As is the case with other unsatisfactory diversions, it is entirely possible to ignore the worst parts of this movie, to drift along during the lulls, slide over the half-baked jokes and just wait for McCarthy and Bateman to do their things.

Escape From Planet Earth **½ Voices of Brendan Fraser, Sarah Jessica Parker, Jessica Alba. Directed by Callan Brunker. Astronaut Scorch Supernova finds himself caught in a trap when he responds to an SOS from a notoriously dangerous alien planet. The picture has enough entertainment value to tickle its target audience and even offers a few chuckles for the adults on the couch as well. A strong cast and bright -- if uninspired — animation help to offset a thin story.

Mental * Liev Schreiber, Toni Collette, Anthony LaPaglia, Rebecca Gibney, Lily Sullivan, Bethany Whitmore. Directed by P.J. Hogan. After his wife has a breakdown, a smarmy politician hires a "nanny" he finds on the side of the road, to care for his daughters. Hogan may have based this film on an actual incident from his childhood, but the crazy quilt of a movie that resulted feels anything but real.

It’s a Disaster **½ Julia Stiles, David Cross, America Ferrera, Erinn Hayes, Jeff Grace, Rachel Boston, Kevin M. Brennan, Blaise Miller. Directed by Todd Berger. Four couples meet for Sunday brunch only to discover they are stuck in a house together as the world may be about to end. Berger’s got some clever ideas, but he does not push far in exploring them. And aside from Cross, there is virtually no one to like among these self-involved suburbanites. After an hour alone with them, we can’t help wishing The End would just arrive.

Brooklyn Castle ***½ Directed by Katie Schultz. A documentary that tells the stories of five members of the chess team at a below-the-poverty-line inner city junior high school facing budget cuts that has won more national championships than any other in the country. It's a wonderful look at an astonishingly successful public-school chess program that manages to be more moving and heartening than you expect. Which is saying a lot. It honestly makes no difference if you don't even know the rules of chess and have never visited New York; this is a story about human potential and the lingering possibilities of the American dream.

The Last Ride **½ Henry Thomas, Jesse James, Fred Dalton Thompson, Kaley Cuoco. Directed by Harry Thomason. A young college student agrees to drive volatile country music star Hank Williams to a concert, never guessing he'll be the last one to see him alive. Thomas offers particularly fine work, but the underwritten script, which relies too much on sentimentality, gives him little to do.

Coming in October

Here's a movie I'm looking forward to seeing. It's scheduled to open Oct. 11.

Close captioned for the understanding impaired

This hilarious video courtesy of my South Florida correspondent.