On Doris Day and other old bags

Ever have strange thoughts while driving down the highway late at night -- thoughts other than "I need to wash my hands so badly I'm about to burst" or "I hope I have enough gas to make it home"? As for me I often think about off-the-wall, disconnected things.

Take tonight, for instance. Driving south on U.S. 75, out there where the speed limit is 65 miles an hour, I started wondering "Whaddya think Doris Day is doing right now?". Probably not much, I reckoned, especially since she's 88 years old right now. Truthfully, I was never a big Doris Day fan, although I will admit to liking her two big comedies with Rock Hudson, Pillow Talk and Lover Come Back. I would have liked Alfred Hitchcock's remake of his own The Man Who Knew Too Much a lot better without her song Whatever Will Be, Will Be, but I know I'm in the minority because that single sold a gazillion copies back in 1956. The one thing I am really grateful to Doris Day for was her turning down the role of Mrs. Robinson in The Graduate. Can you really see her parading nude in front of Dustin Hoffman?

But, still, Doris Day is the all-time female box-office champ. That's right. No woman -- not even Angelina Jolie -- has drawn more people into movie theaters than Doris Day. Yet, given that fact, no one ever -- ever -- talks about Doris Day anymore. So, I was thinking:  What's become of Doris Day? I was wondering what she was doing that very minute I was driving south on 75 and sincerely hoping, by golly, she was doing OK.

Another thing I thought about was anyone who thinks they don't build American cars better today than they used to has forgotten all about the car water bag (pictured here, for those either to young to remember them or those who never drove between Phoenix and Los Angeles/San Diego back in the day). Before you dared to cross the Southern California desert back then, you would stop to get one of those contraptions filled with water and drape it over the hood ornament of the car. Those who didn't ran the risk of an overheated radiator hundreds of miles from the nearest gas station and no AAA rescue service. These days, superior engineering has eliminated the need for the car water bag. How do I know? Because cars don't come with hood ornaments any longer.