NBC has the em-FAZZ-is on the wrong sil-LAH-bull

Conan and Jay in happier times

Jay Leno attracting just about the same number of viewers at 9 p.m. that he did at 10:35 p.m. Trouble is, television moguls approximate four times as many people are watching television at 9 p.m. than are watching at 10:35, so those Leno numbers are not good. What makes matters worse is that these same moguls know that viewers don't change channels after that 9 p.m. show; they just watch whatever news comes on the same channel they were watching at 9 p.m. Now local channels make a lot of their income selling advertising during that 10 p.m. news slot and the more viewers they have, the more they can charge advertisers. Translated, that means that all those local stations whose news comes on after Leno aren't exactly thrilled that he's only attracting just about the same number of viewers at 9 p.m. that he did at 10:35 p.m. Once more, they have made their feelings known to the Big Kahunas that run Leno's network, the once-hallowed National Broadcasting Company.

So what are the NBC Big Kahunas doing? It appears to me they are doing nothing to help the locals. They are, instead, deciding to declare Leno's 9 p.m. show bankrupt and move him and his faithful viewers back to 10:35 p.m. But what to do about Conan the Barbobrien, who inherited that sacred spot once occupied by (insert a moment of revered silence here) Johnny Carson? Well, the Big Kahunas have decided to let Conan start his Tonight Show 30 minutes later, at 11:05 p.m. (in most markets his show will actually start the following day, five minutes after midnight). Now Conan may rightfully feel that this is an insult and, more important, a demotion, a penalty placed on him just because for the first time since Steve Allen started this late night talkshow silliness 56 years ago (Does the name Skitch Henderson ring a bell?) , The Tonight Show finds itself behind in the ratings to CBS and David Lettermen, who bolted NBC when he wasn't given the position of host of The Tonight Show. And if Conan does have his feelings hurt so badly that even $24 million per year can salve them (that's massive hurt feelings, folks), he may just follow Letterman's lead and bolt as well. The Fox Network is drooling at that prospect.

So the Big Kahunas are working desperately to find a way to make everyone happy after 10:35 p.m. All I have to say to the Kahunas is this: "10:35 AIN'T THE PROBLEM!!!"

The local stations aren't complaining about what comes after their news. Sure, I would imagine most of them would prefer Leno there over Conan the Barbobrien, but that's not the issue. It's what comes before their news that they are worried about. Are the Big Kahunas doing anything at all about loading the 9 p.m. slots Mondays through Fridays with solid programming? If so, I sure haven't heard a word about it. There are just so many different versions of Law & Order to go around and even those shows are showing signs of wear.

Anyway, if I were one of the Kahunas I would be searching for something solid for the 9 p.m. slots before worrying about negotiating a peace treaty between Jay and Conan.