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Saturday, January 9, 2010

Released this week on DVD: "The Final Destination"


Grade: D

Somewhere in Hollywood there’s a factory dedicated to churning out blank, pretty young actors as fodder for the modern B movie and the teen-angst dramas on CW. With patience, some of these clones develop personalities and learn to act (at which point they’re snatched up by NBC’s Friday Night Lights); for the rest the future is as bleak as a leading role in The Final Destination.

Despite the omission of a numeral in the title, this is the fourth stab at one of the more resilient (and, in its initial incarnation at least, more original) supernatural franchises. The basic premise remains unchanged: an otherwise normal young person begins having premonitions of horrible fatalities, only to discover that death can be temporarily dodged but never completely outrun. For audiences, though, there used to be entertainment in the dodging and wit in the scripts; now there’s 3-D.

Leading this particular crop of sacrificial lambs is Nick (Bobby Campo), a precog whose initial vision tears up a racetrack and facilitates plenty of redneck slurs. From there Nick proceeds through a series of ever-more-intricate stunts linked by the flimsiest of narratives, while the filmmaker, David R. Ellis (who also directed the disappointing Final Destination 2), rakes around for spiked objects to hurl at the be-goggled audience.

But since not even 3-D can put your eyes out, our only hope is that this time, the title is a promise and not a tease.

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